Student Writing Response: Student C, Project 1

Student C —

Great work — thanks for the thoughtful response! I can tell that you put time and effort into understanding Rose’s work, and, as well, into thinking critically about how it relates to yourself as a writer. It is no small task to synthesize multiple pieces of your own writing into one polished work, but I think that you did that really well. Although you mention trepidation towards writing and the fact that English is your second language, I think that you are a very strong writer, stronger than you give yourself credit for (if you’d like any more help with grammar, sentence construction, or overall cohesion, please, swing by my office anytime!).

I really liked your point in the third paragraph where you take the ideas that Rose has presented and then repackage them from your own standpoint. The idea of “bending” or “carving” through the options in a more fluid fashion is something Rose argues for and something you express eloquently. I would be curious to hear in more detail about the ways in which this particular fluidity resonates with you. Can you think of any other, specific, instances where you could sense this resonance? Times when you could feel it’s absence? Would you include those in a further version of this essay?

Keep up the good work.

Ivan

 

Reflection on the Process:

I definitely wanted to take a more global approach towards this response. After hearing the details about the English 100 course and it’s nature, I felt like I really wanted to draw attention overall to the successful pieces of this work in order to encourage and engage the student, hopefully. I think, especially writing with English as a second language, I wanted to draw attention to the really well thought out and presented elements within the essay. That doesn’t mean that there weren’t grammar or cohesion issues that could be improved, but it seemed like the smaller element that could be addressed later. Why not address and celebrate the achievement first.

I didn’t want to seem overbearing in my response in offering constructive criticism or help. So, I chose to have my offer towards help with grammar, structure, and cohesion to a minimum, to a place embedded within a positive part of the response. I chose not to go into detail about these edits, and, instead, chose to highlight my willingness to work one-on-one with them in my office outside of class. I can see addressing the issues in the response, which, I suppose would be the thing that I question most about my comments to the student. I think that it could possibly be beneficial to give concrete examples to the students. However, I do think that I prefer the way that I chose to respond to the student given the structure and goal of this particular class.